The first step to helping is recognizing that real distress–not naughtiness-is behind these frustrating behaviors
From noise complaints to destroyed furniture, separation anxiety affects countless dogs and their families. But as Nicola Cook, founder of Poochy People in York, UK, explains in a recent episode of Victoria Stilwell’s Positively Podcast, this isn’t about naughty behavior—it’s about real distress that can be resolved with the right approach.
Nicola, a Victoria Stilwell Positively Dog Trainer (VSPDT) and Certified Separation Anxiety Trainer (CSAT), has built her practice around helping dogs who struggle when their guardians leave. Her compassionate, science-based methods are transforming lives for both dogs and their families.
The Pandemic’s Lasting Impact
“We get inundated with inquiries for various types of separation issues,” Nicola says. While separation anxiety has always existed, the pandemic brought it into sharp focus. “There’s a whole bunch of puppies who were used to having somebody there at the beginning—the pandemic puppies, the dogs who are like five years old now. Once their owners did need to start going back to work, it became evident that they just couldn’t cope.”
Another concerning factor? Those pandemic puppies are now having puppies of their own, potentially passing anxiety down genetic lines. Add to this increased awareness of the signs and more people working from home who can hear what’s really happening when they leave, and it’s clear why separation anxiety cases seem to be everywhere.
Recognizing the Real Signs
Many guardians misidentify separation anxiety, so Nicola breaks down what to actually look for. The big three signs are elimination, destruction, and vocalization—but context matters.
“If your dog is normally perfectly toilet trained and you are coming home to them having eliminated, even if you’ve just walked up the road, that would be a little bit of an alarm bell,” she says. Some distressed dogs will even vomit when left alone.
Destruction is another key indicator, but not the typical puppy chewing. “I mean they are biting furniture, digging up carpets. Look at your exit areas. If a lot of where they’re destroying stuff is near doors, that’s a real sign that something’s not quite right.”
And vocalization? It often continues far longer than guardians realize. “So many people say, ‘Oh, they only bark for a few minutes and then they calm down.’ But if you don’t have a pet cam, how do you know?” Many dogs will bark intermittently throughout the day, exhausting themselves in cycles of panic and brief rest.
Other telltale signs include dogs who obsessively follow their guardians around the house, physically block exits, or show extreme distress during departure preparations. “They want to make sure you’re not going out that front door,” Nicola explains. “They’re keeping their eye on you.”
Beyond Behavior: The Emotional Toll
What strikes Nicola most is the emotional exhaustion these dogs experience. “The panic that they feel is real panic. It’s a fear. Imagine that every day.” Dogs can spend hours in a state of high anxiety, which takes an enormous toll on their wellbeing.
For guardians, the impact is equally significant. “When you see your dog getting upset, it’s horrible. You do feel terrible leaving,” Nicola says. Many people find themselves unable to leave the house, trapped in a shrinking world alongside their distressed pet.
A Path Forward
“It can be helped. It really can. It just needs the right angle,” she assures guardians. Nicola works virtually with clients, using video recordings to assess what’s really happening and creating customized training plans. The typical process involves helping dogs build positive associations with alone time at their own pace.
Nicola’s work exemplifies the Victoria Stilwell Academy’s commitment to force-free, science-based training. With patience, understanding, and professional guidance, dogs can learn that being alone doesn’t have to be frightening.
You can listen to the full podcast episode with Nicola Cook on Victoria Stilwell’s Positively Podcast about helping dogs overcome separation anxiety.
Learn more about preparing for a rewarding career as a dog trainer with VSA’s premier Dog Trainer Course.
